I have been inspired to write the next great musical. Well actually I've been trying to do this for the past two years, and I do have several nice little piano numbers under my belt, but that is beside the point.
My job just never ceases to amaze me. The Waffle House is the only place I know that has a jukebox full of original tunes about Hashbrowns, and Cheeseburgers, and Raisin Toast. Well, I've been thinking, which at times can be a very scary thing for I am the King of really bad ideas; my thoughts culminated in Waffle House the Musical.
Here is the list of songs I have started writing
Hello(prologue)
Four Top
Running out of Biscuits
Ballad of the Coffee Pots
Team Handwash
Midnight
Bar Rush
Sidework (Act one finale) ****(This will be the showstopper for the ages)
I don't have anything quite else quite yet. I haven't been able to sit down and write quite yet, but I have some tunes in my head, and some lyrics too. I can't wait to start.
I Love My Job
Monday, March 31, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Folsom Prison Waffles
Once more today's writing come straight out of my crazy job. Night shift is filled with the goonies, and loonies that make my soul happy, and my pocket too. The point of the matter is, last night we had once exceptional customer whom brought us the most joy we have had in quite a long time.
Don, or Jimmy, or Mr. dude, he gave us multiple names, came into the waffle house about 3:30 in the morning, and brought with him the personality of twelve drunks. This man sang to us, he danced with us, and he even broke several rules that we had to ask him to refrain from.
To begin with he came running in and sat in the middle booth and just started giggling. I asked him if he wanted a minute to look at the menu and he said that would be awesome. So I went and got him his orange juice, and he began to sing about how he loves orange juice. He raised his glass in the air and sang hallelujah to his OJ. For several minutes he just sat rambling on about his OJ and not even looking at the menu. After he ordered, he began to tell us about the fight between Frank Sinatra, and Harry Connick Jr. the other day. Apparently they had been staying Michael Buble and Harry caught Michael sleeping with Frankie. I don't even know where he was coming from, but it was quite funny.
After chanting about Maple and Flapstacks...AKA waffles with syrup, he chose to put on some Johnny Cash on the Jukebox, and sang and danced for us. Ten minutes later he passed out in our booth, it was disturbing, so I called the cook over and he woke back up. He went outside to smoke, and when I went out to check on him a few minutes later, he was laying on the ground with his eyes rolled back in his head. I asked loudly if he was okay, and he said yes.
He refused to let us call him a cab, and after leaving both the cook and I 5 dollars each, he went on his drunken way. I hope Don or Jimmy, or whoever he is, comes back tonight
Don, or Jimmy, or Mr. dude, he gave us multiple names, came into the waffle house about 3:30 in the morning, and brought with him the personality of twelve drunks. This man sang to us, he danced with us, and he even broke several rules that we had to ask him to refrain from.
To begin with he came running in and sat in the middle booth and just started giggling. I asked him if he wanted a minute to look at the menu and he said that would be awesome. So I went and got him his orange juice, and he began to sing about how he loves orange juice. He raised his glass in the air and sang hallelujah to his OJ. For several minutes he just sat rambling on about his OJ and not even looking at the menu. After he ordered, he began to tell us about the fight between Frank Sinatra, and Harry Connick Jr. the other day. Apparently they had been staying Michael Buble and Harry caught Michael sleeping with Frankie. I don't even know where he was coming from, but it was quite funny.
After chanting about Maple and Flapstacks...AKA waffles with syrup, he chose to put on some Johnny Cash on the Jukebox, and sang and danced for us. Ten minutes later he passed out in our booth, it was disturbing, so I called the cook over and he woke back up. He went outside to smoke, and when I went out to check on him a few minutes later, he was laying on the ground with his eyes rolled back in his head. I asked loudly if he was okay, and he said yes.
He refused to let us call him a cab, and after leaving both the cook and I 5 dollars each, he went on his drunken way. I hope Don or Jimmy, or whoever he is, comes back tonight
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Jesus was found in the laundry
Very strange title, yes it is, but in all honesty.....Apparently Jesus was found in some man's laundry. The story goes like this.
Yesterday evening I was doing my sister's laundry at the laundromat or however you spell that evil word, and I saw this poster talking about how Jesus has been found and he isn't coming back. Of course being a spiritual perosn but not directly religous I was intrigued by that and had to tear off the little strip on the bottom of the flyer and call the number. BIG MISTAKE!!!!
I took the number to Waffle House where I work and my friend Shannon, Morgan and I all called this man asking about his findings. He wouldn't tell us over the phone so I set up a time to meet him at McDonalds for a bible study. The silly things is, I actually went. This man could have been a serial rapist, a killer, or just a babbling fool. but the good things is he wasn't at least not in my opinion.
Upon his arrival at McDonalds he questioned me to make sure I was serious and I just said to him I wanted to know more about his sign. More than anything I was just bored and wanted something to do, so I found about Jesus's return. Basically stated, he said that everything in the bible has aleady happened, and is never going to happen again, and it's all a big joke. I guess?
Hmm, well he throughly ocnfused even though it's all there in the scriptures. (Matthew: 24, 1-19) It's kinda neat. But now he has my phone number, my friend's cell phone number, knows the city I live in, my full name, and is expecting me to come to his church on sunday morning. HAHAHAHAHAH. HELL NO!
I don't have a problem with church, only strange religions that believe Jesus is a fake and isn't coming back. This includes ones who advertise/recruit/whatever word you wanna call it.
The good news is, I still had time to finish the laundry and fold it before 10PM.
Yesterday evening I was doing my sister's laundry at the laundromat or however you spell that evil word, and I saw this poster talking about how Jesus has been found and he isn't coming back. Of course being a spiritual perosn but not directly religous I was intrigued by that and had to tear off the little strip on the bottom of the flyer and call the number. BIG MISTAKE!!!!
I took the number to Waffle House where I work and my friend Shannon, Morgan and I all called this man asking about his findings. He wouldn't tell us over the phone so I set up a time to meet him at McDonalds for a bible study. The silly things is, I actually went. This man could have been a serial rapist, a killer, or just a babbling fool. but the good things is he wasn't at least not in my opinion.
Upon his arrival at McDonalds he questioned me to make sure I was serious and I just said to him I wanted to know more about his sign. More than anything I was just bored and wanted something to do, so I found about Jesus's return. Basically stated, he said that everything in the bible has aleady happened, and is never going to happen again, and it's all a big joke. I guess?
Hmm, well he throughly ocnfused even though it's all there in the scriptures. (Matthew: 24, 1-19) It's kinda neat. But now he has my phone number, my friend's cell phone number, knows the city I live in, my full name, and is expecting me to come to his church on sunday morning. HAHAHAHAHAH. HELL NO!
I don't have a problem with church, only strange religions that believe Jesus is a fake and isn't coming back. This includes ones who advertise/recruit/whatever word you wanna call it.
The good news is, I still had time to finish the laundry and fold it before 10PM.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Asian Waffles taste good with Thousand Island
Working at Waffle House, especially the night shift, is insane. It takes a seriously fucked up individual to survive a havre de grace night shift, and working with the people I do makes me want to pour hot sauce into my eyes, but I don't like that so I haven't yet.
Tonight, or this morning or whatever it is has been particularly boring, except for the fact that at this moment I am listening to my cook yelling at some of our regulars. This is the routine, I sit and do my thing, she yells and screams at the customers and usually walks out with more tips than I do, even though she isn't supposed to.
There were a group of asians in, and they didn't speak English. Waffle House does not sell fish, nor do they discriminate based on race, ethnicity or any of that other bull, but we do. Or maybe Crystal and I do. I'm not racist, but I am opposed to the idea's of silly asian people trying to order salad sauce, and other strange, un-waffly items.
This blog has become my new place to kvetch, so get used to it, I'll try not to play too rough
Monday, March 24, 2008
The Philosophy of Paychecks
Hello? Okay, so I'm typing on here again. This is my blog and so far nobody has read it but I'm telling you, or me rather that this is going to hold some good stuff. Real honest stuff. I promise it wont be all bitching and kvetching.
Okay, so today I got my paycheck, this happens every monday so maybe it will be a recurring theme in my blog; this is one of the worst days of my week usually when it should be the best. Anyways, back to the blog......
My pay check from Waffle House is usually about a hundred dollars because I am a server and only make $3.08 per hour to start with anyways. But my check was only $80 dollars today and I went off. My boss is one of those types that you don't want to hate. He is fun, funny, and just an overall cool guy until it comes to money. Do not ask him for overtime, he will speak about his philosophy. "NO" is his philosophy; similar to the one used in the Charlie Brown musical....Random I know sorry
But here's the deal. I was looking at my pay stub because I knew things weren't how they should be. It turns out, my boss has been adjusting my clock times, not giving me minimum wage when he should be and stealing my credit card tips. Now, this may seem like your average boss to you; remind me to stop using that pronoun because most likely this will just be kind of like a diary and no one will read it, but who knows. Back on the topic, I asked him why I kept getting clocked out at 7:00Am when I'm usually working til at least 7:15AM, thos extra fifteen minutes a day add up to another hour or so on my check and that three dollars means more money to me, which I need. He even clocked me out at 6:00AM one day, when I worked until 7:30AM. I hate him.
But just another day......
Okay, so today I got my paycheck, this happens every monday so maybe it will be a recurring theme in my blog; this is one of the worst days of my week usually when it should be the best. Anyways, back to the blog......
My pay check from Waffle House is usually about a hundred dollars because I am a server and only make $3.08 per hour to start with anyways. But my check was only $80 dollars today and I went off. My boss is one of those types that you don't want to hate. He is fun, funny, and just an overall cool guy until it comes to money. Do not ask him for overtime, he will speak about his philosophy. "NO" is his philosophy; similar to the one used in the Charlie Brown musical....Random I know sorry
But here's the deal. I was looking at my pay stub because I knew things weren't how they should be. It turns out, my boss has been adjusting my clock times, not giving me minimum wage when he should be and stealing my credit card tips. Now, this may seem like your average boss to you; remind me to stop using that pronoun because most likely this will just be kind of like a diary and no one will read it, but who knows. Back on the topic, I asked him why I kept getting clocked out at 7:00Am when I'm usually working til at least 7:15AM, thos extra fifteen minutes a day add up to another hour or so on my check and that three dollars means more money to me, which I need. He even clocked me out at 6:00AM one day, when I worked until 7:30AM. I hate him.
But just another day......
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Easter Sunday-Waffle House Style
So, This being my first blog, and it being Easter, and the state of mind I am in at this moment; that being nothing short of clinically insane, have decided to create Double J Day by Day.
My name is Joe Johnson, and I am 18 years old. However the hell I survived this long is a feat in itself, but it's just another day for me. The date is March 23, 2008; Easter Sunday, and I am sitting in Waffle House writing this blog instead of spending time with family. It's no big deal, I could be with them, or rather sitting in the same house as them but be ignored and shunned for the pure sake that I am the step-son.
The story goes like this, and it is this with every holiday. My mother, my step-dad and I go to his mother's house and eat dinner. My step-Grandmother is a very nice lady and I love her to death but things just aren't right. There are spots at the dinner table for the 6 year old, spots for the babies too, but not for me. I get the exclusive pleasure of sitting alone at the kitchen table. Now tell me, do you think that as something fun for me. I had my fill of it Christmas Eve when everyone was laughing and having a good time, while I sat alone, without anyone to eat with, to talk to, and my mom had the nerve to ask me, "What's wrong?"
18 years of life is more than alot of people think it is. I have had my ups and downs, and road bumps; I have taken a major nose dive once or twice, but it's all good. This year is better......kind of.
I am sitting in Waffle House, my job. It isn't too busy and I wish I was working so that I didn't have to go home to see my family. My friends are here, people who like me and want to spend time with me....I think. But yeah, I can say, that Easter in the waffle house is worth every bad holiday before hand. Hell, I get to blog in here, something I couldn't do at the family's place.
Thanks
Joe Johnson
My name is Joe Johnson, and I am 18 years old. However the hell I survived this long is a feat in itself, but it's just another day for me. The date is March 23, 2008; Easter Sunday, and I am sitting in Waffle House writing this blog instead of spending time with family. It's no big deal, I could be with them, or rather sitting in the same house as them but be ignored and shunned for the pure sake that I am the step-son.
The story goes like this, and it is this with every holiday. My mother, my step-dad and I go to his mother's house and eat dinner. My step-Grandmother is a very nice lady and I love her to death but things just aren't right. There are spots at the dinner table for the 6 year old, spots for the babies too, but not for me. I get the exclusive pleasure of sitting alone at the kitchen table. Now tell me, do you think that as something fun for me. I had my fill of it Christmas Eve when everyone was laughing and having a good time, while I sat alone, without anyone to eat with, to talk to, and my mom had the nerve to ask me, "What's wrong?"
18 years of life is more than alot of people think it is. I have had my ups and downs, and road bumps; I have taken a major nose dive once or twice, but it's all good. This year is better......kind of.
I am sitting in Waffle House, my job. It isn't too busy and I wish I was working so that I didn't have to go home to see my family. My friends are here, people who like me and want to spend time with me....I think. But yeah, I can say, that Easter in the waffle house is worth every bad holiday before hand. Hell, I get to blog in here, something I couldn't do at the family's place.
Thanks
Joe Johnson
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